The Lollipop

A humorous take on a horror subject. Enjoy.
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Irene loved lollipops. Everyday on her way back from school she would pass by Mr. Johnson's Drugstore and buy herself a lollipop. She would stand by the counter, thoughtfully staring at the multitude of flavors and colors. Mr. Johnson would look at her from the corner of his eyes as he stacked cigarettes behind the counter and smile inwardly. Here's the lollipop girl again, he would think.

Irene's favorite flavor was chocolate-banana. To her it tasted like a magical banana split ice-cream where all the wonderful flavors exploded in her mouth, all at once. She would always close her eyes to savor that first lick, that first taste in her mouth. She would sigh and think, All my troubles are gone, oh how I love my lollipops.

Today was no different. At the sound of the bell, she bid her pals goodbye, picked up her backpack and walked out of her classroom. A couple of "See yas" and a handful of "I'll call you tonights" later, she was out of the school halls and into the crisp autumn afternoon. She took in the soft wind that blew into her face and through her hair. It was quite cold, but not cold enough to numb your nose. It was a perfect kind of cold, thought Irene.

Then she remembered. Lollipop time! The thought of unwrapping a banana-chocolate or a strawberry lollipop put a bounce in her step as she walked the few blocks down toward Mr. Johnson's store. Maybe I'll try something different today, she thought. Maybe I'll try that new flavor, what was it? Ah, Creamy Mango! Maybe I'll try that today.

Ten minutes later, she arrived at Mr. Johnson's Drugstore. The door had one of those old-fashioned brass bells attached to it, and it clinked merrily as she entered the shop. As usual, she went straight to the counter where the lollipops were. Mr. Johnson put the lollipops in a large glass jar, so anyone with a sweet tooth could see the myriad flavors available.

Irene's nose wrinkled a bit as she tried to pick out a good flavor. She was torn between banana-chocolate; her favorite, and the new Creamy Mango. After thinking it through, she decided on Creamy Mango. She took out her choice, paid Mr. Johnson, and left the shop.

She picked out the new one, thought Mr. Johnson. I'll bet she ain't gonna like it much.

Irene hastily unwrapped her lollipop and popped it in her mouth. She didn't close her eyes this time, because she was always wary of new flavors. If she had her eyes closed and didn't like the new taste, she was afraid that the new flavor might stick on her tongue for a long time, and she would have to drink Coca-Cola to get rid of the aftertaste. Irene did not like Coca-Cola, or any other colas for that matter.

The new lollipop was swirling around in her mouth. Hmmm, not bad, she thought. Creamy Mango wasn't what she expected at all. It had a nice, tangy tinge to it, and the mango tasted like the real thing.

But then Irene felt lightheaded and dizzy all of a sudden. She thought that maybe the flavor was too strong for her. She felt like the time when her cousin Angie went to the Thai specialty store and brought home a strange fruit called the durian. She had taken a whiff of the strong-smelling fruit and felt woozy. This was how she felt at the moment.

Her vision was starting to get dark, and the images of her surroundings were spinning as if she were a little beetle perched on a spinning top. She didn't even realize it when she passed out.

Irene woke up to find herself lying down in a brightly lit room, so bright that she couldn't even make out where the walls ended and the floor began. She was naked, lying on some sort of bed, like a hospital bed with no railings. The bed was hard, like a rock slab. There was a cushion underneath her head, but that was also hard and uncomfortable.

She tried to scream but nothing came out of her mouth, only air. She tried to move her arms and legs, but they were tied down with restraints. She panicked.

Oh my God, where am I? she thought.

I want my Mommy. Please help me, Mommy.

She heard a door open, and footsteps coming toward her. Finally, someone's here to save me. But when the footsteps reached her, she was horrified to see a creature, standing like a man but with a long, segmented neck that wove about like a centipede, and even looked like a centipede. At the end of the neck there was a large rectangular head with eight large, black, shining eyes. It's mouth - if you could call it that - was protected by a pair of thorny mandibles, that opened and shut as the creature breathed. There were two curved horns that protruded from both sides of its head.

The creature wore, of all things, a lab coat. Inside the lab coat, it wore a white button-down shirt with a blue tie. On the coat's lapel there was a nametag with it's terrible picture on it. Irene, in her panic, read the name tag : Dr. Dratsab Cinomed, MD. And with that, Irene wet herself.

The creature - the doctor - looked at the puddle of urine between Irene's legs and took out what seemed to be a hand held tape recorder. It pressed a button and spoke into the recorder, in perfect English.

"The subject, a pink-hued, prepubescent, female humanoid, has just pissed herself. I suspect the reason is fear. As with all the subjects I have studied, this subject is absolutely terrified at seeing me. In a moment she will probably start to lose control of her bowels - oh, there you go. The subject has excreted an unusually large amount of feces. It smells like the fruit these humans call Mango. Apparently this subject has eaten the bait we left in Dr. Toidi's - or should I say Mr. Johnson's - glass jar."

Irene tried to cry out, but again, her voice failed her. The doctor-creature spoke again into his tape recorder.

"The subject is unable to vocalize, which means that the vocal-chord paralyzing agent is working like a charm. There's actually no need for all these restraints, but it is essential that she doesn't flounder about when the little Iakgnatreb Alug burst out of her rectum. It should happen in a few moments, I have already placed the container near her rectum."

What? Burst out of where? Irene thought frantically. She couldn't even shed any tears, her paralysis was so complete. Oh, Mommy, save me please. I want to go to school. I want to see my friends. I want to watch TV. I want to kiss you, Mommy. Please come.

Suddenly, Irene felt an intense pain in her stomach. She could only scream in her mind. And in her mind, she was screaming for all the world to hear. The stabbing pain wracked her frail little body, causing it to tremble and struggle against her restraints even though she was paralyzed.

Out of her rectum, tiny little lollipops of all shapes, sizes and colors started pouring out. The flow started getting bigger, and bigger, more and more lollipops were spurting out like tadpoles along with feces and blood.

Irene was convulsing. The pain was unbearable.

Mommy, I want this to end. Please. I can't take this anymore.

Irene's rectum tore into a gaping hole as the burden became too much for her. The lollipops were cascading like a waterfall now, filling the container placed near her body. Irene's intestines and guts poured out along with the lollipops.

The doctor-creature spoke into his tape recorder, "The subject is on the verge of death, I think. We have enough Iakgnatreb Alug to last Dr. Toidi another year at the very least. I shall send them over to Mrs. Tnuc for sterilization, then to Dr. Krodparc for spiking. As usual, Dr. Toidi will pick up the new batch."

And with that, the doctor-creature turned off his tape recorder with a click.

Fortunately, Irene never heard the click.

She was dead.